Doug Bartlett interview with Retrospect Galleries in Byron Bay

Right now I am…
I am skinning a 120kg pig.

The person who has most influenced my art is…
Me

My favourite artist is…
Me

I’m inspired to start a new work when….
I’ve had my fifth long neck (750ml) of cold beer

I am at my most creative/productive when…
I’m angry

I usually start my day by…
Coughing up blood

I am currently reading….
Thus Spoke Zarathustra. Friedrich Nietzche

The book that changed my life is…
Lord of the Flies – William Golding.
Laid out a clear path for me to follow as a young man.

My favourite album of all time is…
I wanna make you my lady – Mark Holden

My favourite film of all time is…
Death in Venice

When I am working I like to listen to…
Silence, or the gentle sounds of a chainsaw or gunfire

It makes me smile when…
My partner dons his gardening gear

I get angry about…
Ten thirty or so (in the morning)

My three most valued possessions are…
My guns, my bullets and my beer and Lovers…

The three things in life I could never give up are…
Pork, Grog and hunting

If I was stranded on a desert island I would want…
A gun

If I could travel anywhere back and forth in time, I would go…
Back to Mauritius to eat the last dodo.

If I was elected Prime Minister of Australia the first thing I would do is…
No child over the age of 12 will be without a firearm

My dream dinner party of six would include….
Gordon Ramsay, Bruce Ruxton, John Laws, Alan Jones, Pauline Hansen and Nelson Mandela

If it were my party, I would serve…
Beer and meat

The achievement I am most proud of is…
When I ate that dodo

My most embarrassing moment was…
When I vomited on the Queen

The craziest thing I have ever done was…
I have never done anything crazy

The most valuable lesson I have learned in life is…
Get money off people…

When I die, I would like my gravestone to say…
Here lieth the greatest artiste and gentleman of his age.
Or maybe a highly advanced ape. R.I.P.

If a young person told me they wanted to be like me when they grow up, I would tell them…
Dream on you little shit.

I wish I had listened when my parents told me…
Piss off Doug

I hope my art.….
Touches people

My legacy to the world will be…
A few paintings. A few less feral pigs…

If I wasn’t an artist I would like to be….
A spanish whore or female mud wrestler.